The rage machine dwindles and shimmers on the horizon, always a tiny dot in my rear-view, or just over that far hill.
The reptilian brain. The oldest part of sentience, the first thing that is truly ours. Rage.

Raging as you wake up hungry in a wet diaper, cold, some hippy left the window open after they burned the lentils again. Sharing the rage with the world at the top of your tiny but expressive lungs.

Getting into it now as you hear them coming for you, to shut you up with lies about love. Well, this time they are going to hear the full story, feel it's dark cavernous empty depths, respect my authority!

"There, there baby, you are all wet you little silly-pants, Aww!" A nipple in my mouth shuts up an awful lot of my rage and why is it so easy to get me in line with a promise of a full belly like this mouthful right here and life is in the moment, baby, and this is starting to get good with the bouncing and let's see where she's going with this, I'm STILL mad, YO.... Just sayn.

Resistance starts to fade, can't we all just get along, but no, they will never learn if you cave in this easily, stand up for our rage rights baby boy, resist the rocking and the cooing and what is this awful trick? This is a rubber nipple, not a bottle tip! I refuse to be pacified so easily, you had better call in for an airstrike, get your napalm buddy, because this baby rage is entrenched!

Another be-diapered terrorist cell becomes activated.
The torture never stops.



Wednesday, February 20, 2013

its easy to spot the canadians at a poker table in vegas
there are, as they say in poker, tells
standoff ish ness is one clue
they keep to themselves from long winters alone
holed up behind thiick insulating walls
huddling closer to the seal skin lamp which provides both light and heat
the faint smell of seal oil never leaves thier pores completely
stand next to danile negranu sometime and take a whiff
the patchouli he wears almost does the trick
but it still registers on the palate
a mix of king crab, jellyfish and herring that once smelled can never be unsmelled

another canadian tell is that they are the highest ones at the table
right after you notice the seal oil smell you get hit with the cloud of recently smoked pot that is sticking to their clothing like the dirt followed pig pen in the peanuts cartoon
they got that good stuff up there in BC
grown by ameircan draft dodging hippies and exchanged in leiu of rent
they have free weed stations at the public restrooms in candinadia
this glout of hi grade pot is why their governemnt feels they can get away with anything
and conrad black could only exist in a place where everyone is zoning out 24 hours a day

maybe this is why they take bad beats so well
thats poker, eh? they say as they get up and smile graciously
wishing the table luck and saying goodbyr to the other canadians in the room
lets go oot later, eh?
yaa yaa

a rush tee shirt is a dead giveaway
as are the ubiquitous aviator shades
top gun is still the best movie a canadian has ever scene
they have festivals up there
the ottowa "ice man" festival is the largest movie dress up carnival in canadinadia
val kilmer can't get through the airports up there
one tellt hais100percnt on is when a canadindian is on a draw you can hear him humming
"highway to the dangerzone"

the last tell i will share with you is they are all stuck up
male and female alike
i flirst with them and they don't flirt back
they know im using them for citizenship
gay marraige is ok up there
id live in a loveless sham gay marraige just to play pokerstars in my undies again
i miss you so much pokerstars!
 

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