the stewardess

the stewardess flew into my life unexpectedly last fall
a couple of the dudes from the rugby team were in the philly airport bar
waiting for their flight
a couple other guys were seeing them off
getting one last good load in
setting all kinds of personal lows
epic debauchery and douchebaggery
buddy fucking, not in the gay way
my idea on one such trip is to salute the players
like fireboats do when theres a big event
we were whitewater rafting
i stood on the bridge waiting for the next rafts to come by and i starrted taking a piss right as they approached
the frantic reverse paddling and shrieks of agaony were hilarious to hear
these are all somehwhat bruising individuals with a propensity of violence.
i shared that propensity
i was the dude with the handcuffs that year.
i was a swift, savage hillbilly
an aggressive prick
im in the corrective action department
i tilt the scales of mayhem my way in direct and subtle ways by always looking for a slight edge
momentum, weight, physics, mental, leverage, dental
we step on each other at rugby practice with aluminum boots
you practice how you place
why throw a fist illegally, when you can body slam someone legally?
retaliate in advance
its not a cheap shot its called aggreswsive rucking
i was the guy who ended the moshpits
first one i was ever in was with some polynesians in california
it was a lot of rib shaking fun
i thought thats why they were so fun
it was just like rucking
but i enter them at lollopolozza and the got reall small until its just me and another hillbilly banging heads and everyone else staying out of range of us....

for a while i was big and fast and life was good
in college we were ready to go again on monday
hitting at practice
you practice how you pllay
so we kicked the shit out of each other at kutztown
what elase you gonna do in that town
its a teachers college
fucking drinking rugby
its why it took me 12 years to get my bachelors
where was i going?
playing college rugby was about the most fun i ever had in my life
where i learned that there are limits
but not many
but every now and then your body isnt moving so great and hopefully you are drunk but sometimes its physical
i really think that all the standing around at the rugby party as it continues to last call and beyond really helps you recuperate... your body  keeps moving,  beer is a great liquid foodsopurce and can sustain you for a whole week if neccessary

so thats the first chapter there........

the second one is about  is how we are princes of pain.  monks.  peaceful violent men.  but begins back where we bagan this experimental fiction.  i will wean myself from the electronic teat  starting now.....